So, childhood trauma….
When you have a trauma, it is later, when you can overcome it, that you can relate to other people with similar circumstances. After you have dealt with your situation, then, it is easier to have empathy and compassion towards others. Right?
Childhood trauma is just an example of something from the past. We give it weight to avoid confronting ourselves. This is the point we need to understand. In this case, we can use childhood trauma as an example.
I, myself, used to do that for a long time. I would give my trauma weight instead of using it to confront myself. It was like, ‘Oh, I had this trauma. I had this, this, and this. This happened to me. So, now, I cannot be a normal person. I cannot be part of society because I have such and such.”
Do you understand? I believed it. With this belief, I kind of clipped my wings.
I hope you can see what I am saying. I limited myself because I was putting myself down by believing that I could not move forward as a normal human being… I thought I could not be functional… let us say. So, it took me a long time to be able to… change that perspective of myself.
How was I able to slowly overcome a lot of trauma? The first step was to have a chat with myself. I would say, ‘OK. If something bad happened, something like that happened to you, how do you transform that’?
So, number one, you use it as a tool. You use it as a means. You use it as something to help others… Do you see? If you can overcome it, then, you can help others to overcome similar situations. So, already, that way, you are giving it a positive spin… You are assigning a positive weight to it. Right?
The second way of transforming this trauma is through understanding. It is like… most of the time this trauma happened when you were a kid. Kids are innocent. So, when something like that happens to a child, it would probably be a trauma that is being passed from one generation to another. In other words, it is something the adults have not been able to overcome. So, since they have not dealt with that trauma, themselves, they pass it on to their children unwittingly. They pass it to the next generation. So, when you can see this with understanding, now, at least you learn from it… Through understanding this process, you do not need to carry the trauma, anymore. You can stop it. Do you see?
If you use it as a weight, you cannot learn from it. It is not a lesson anymore; it is a weight. If you use it as a lesson, then the weight disappears. It is something that is going to help you move forward even better.
It is like… having better equipment to move forward. So, that is about perception. That is about how you use things that come to you in life to be able to transform them into what you need at that moment to help others. That is the motivation. So, then, you can neutralize and transform them.
I think that is something that we must do every day. It is a process.
For me, it has been 18 years of therapy that I am doing with myself. I still have at least ten more years probably, or more. I do not know.
At least I am getting somewhere. Do you understand?
If I look forward, I can get desperate saying… ‘Wow, there is so much for me to do… I am so far away…from reaching any kind of… mental state where I feel functional, part of society, and sane in the head.’
Then, when I look back, I say, ‘Ok, at least I got here’. ‘I got to this point.’ So, that helps me a lot to keep moving forward, you see.
The thing is… everybody has their issues. We cannot compare…. one person to another because we are all different. You must understand this. We are all unique. We have different perspectives. So, that is the thing…
Empathy is about relating to everybody starting with yourself. So, the more you cultivate these inner values, the happier person we are each going to be.
The more we try to achieve the outer values like materialism, information, control, profit, self-interest, social approval, and power…it is not going to satisfy our needs because we are light beings. Our inner nature is of pure love. We are pure, pure form. That is our frequency. The values… the true values are inside of us.
There are many values like that. I mean, you can think about many I am sure, right? Let us see… What values do we have inside?
Love. Purity. Kindness. Humility. Joy. Presence. Equanimity. Truth. Caring. Trust. Community. Family. Wisdom. Patience and many more, right?
There is so much to us. These are the things that you can carry to your next life. Nobody can steal these values from you. Nobody can take them from you.
When you share them, it all multiplies. How awesome is that? Ridiculously awesome and you can take them to your next life!!
Ok, so thank you! Please, keep confronting yourself. Please, keep trying but be gentle. Do not freak out looking at how far you must go. Feel satisfied at how far you have come. Then, keep moving in a forward direction. Thank you!